Archive for the 'Humor' Category

The Haircut

Wednesday, July 11th, 2007

A young boy had just gotten his driver’s license and asked his father if
they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he’d make a deal
with his son. “You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study
your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we’ll talk about the car.”

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he’d settle for the
offer and they agreed on it. After about six weeks his father said,
“Son, I’ve been real proud. You brought your grades up and I’ve observed
that you have been studying your Bible, but I’m real disappointed you
didn’t get your hair cut.”

Respect Our Federal Employees

Monday, July 9th, 2007

 A cocky U.S. Department of Agriculture representative stopped at a farm
and talked with an old farmer.   He told the farmer, “I need to inspect
your farm.”

The old farmer said, “OK, but don’t go in that field right over yonder.”

The Agriculture representative said, “Mister, I have the authority of
the United States Government with me.  See this card?  The card means I
am allowed to go WHEREVER I WISH on any agricultural land.   No
questions asked or answered.  Have I made myself clear?  Do you
understand!”

The farmer nodded politely and went about his farm chores.

Satan Arrives At Church

Wednesday, June 27th, 2007

People were in their pews talking at church. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church.

Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon everyone had exited the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seeming oblivious to the fact that God’s ultimate enemy was in his presence.

So Satan walked up to the old man and said, “Don’t you know who I am?”

The man replied, “Yep, sure do.”

Ghost Sex

Thursday, June 14th, 2007

Bloggers Note: The tag line at the end is just a “little” dirty, depending on your taste. LOL Sent to me by one of my friends…thanks TW.

Ghost Sex

International Womens Day

Wednesday, June 13th, 2007

Bloggers Note: This one is cute, sent to me by my Aunt – Thanks, it really lifted up my day!

Happy  IVGLDSW Day!  
 Today is  International Very Good Looking, Damn Smart Woman’s Day, so please send this  message to someone you think fits this description. Please do not send it  back to me as I have already received it from a Very Good Looking, Damn  Smart Woman!